Amanda

I know it is a long time away, but i have started working on Matt’s Christmas present. I have been really getting into painting, although i kind of suck at it right now.  The first one I did was terrible, but attempt number two and three are a lot better :)  I shall post pictures later, but I need to think of ideas to paint, it is actually a lot harder than I thought…

I have decided to start using this thing more often, just so you are aware :)

I know I am only 19.  But I really want to get married.  Ever since I was 4 playing with Barbie and planning her wedding, I have wanted one.  I have been thinking about it ever since then.  Fortunately, or unfortunately, the lack of boyfriend in most of my life until recently here has made me not think about it as much once I stopped playing with Barbie.  But now, here I am again.  Wanting to get married.  It doesn’t help that I know this is where Matt and I are heading, so I am thinking to myself, ‘Why wait?’ I know that there are things, like time and money that are involved, and guys are weird about proposing.  I don’t quite understand it, but whatever.  However, I refuse to propose. REFUSE!  I know it is selfish, but I just want it to happen already.  I hate waiting.  It just makes it worse that Matt and I talk about it, because he knows that is where this is going to.  So it isn’t like I am being some crazy girlfriend!  Both parties agree on this one!  I know this is stupid, it really honestly is.  I know it is going to happen, I just want to know when, I really don’t have much patience when it comes to my own life.  I want things to happen sooner than they will.  Damn.  All well…

Life sucks…well not really, but sometimes it does.  What you want, you usually can’t have.  And that sucks.  Sometimes it is just something that takes time to get and you have to wait, and I hate waiting!  Other times, it involves another party, so you have to wait for that party to want what you want which, again, invovles waiting, and a lot of praying and hoping.  That is really all I can say…I know this doesn’t make since, but it helped.  The end

I am trying to figure this out…so yea give me a bit and I will get it!